Were girlfriends & wives as hypergamous as today in the past?

Some men claim that women are inherently hypergamous. I was a teenager in the nineties and recall how male-female relationships were back then.

Let’s reminisce about the 90’s.

During that era, young girlfriends rarely discussed exotic holiday destinations. Many women preferred vacationing at nearby resorts. Nowadays, the trend leans toward far-flung travel destinations by air or long road trips.

I don’t recall women inquiring about their boyfriend’s or husband’s ability to purchase an expensive car or vacation at a luxurious resort. Nor do I remember young women asking their partners to buy a house or take out a mortgage; those decisions were typically made by men.

In the nineties, it seemed that there were more male heavy spenders than female ones.

I don’t recall women admiring men solely based on their wealth during that time. Conversations revolving around a man’s riches were uncommon in the nineties. Poor women didn’t typically expect to marry a wealthy man; if a rich man married a poor woman, it was often by chance, not strategy. Nowadays, however, it’s common to hear women discussing their affluent relatives and their possessions like houses and luxury cars systematically.

Women of the nineties

In the nineties, women typically enjoyed better living conditions than their parents, and they were content with this improvement. They didn’t feel the need to pressure their husbands into achieving a wealthy lifestyle, nor did they burden men with financial expectations.

During the ’90s, the majority of women aspired to have careers, and there were few who desired to be traditional housewives. However, nowadays, some women prefer to stay at home and not work.

Financial Expectations

Furthermore, I’ve observed women from the nineties who, as they’ve grown older, have heightened their expectations of their husbands and men in general. In other words, hypergamy isn’t exclusive to millennial women; it’s a global phenomenon. For instance, I know a woman who showed no interest in SUVs until she turned 45 in 2005. Since then, she has consistently pressured her husband to purchase SUVs, resulting in them acquiring three large SUVs since 2005, each costing twice as much as their previous cars.

This isn’t an isolated incident. Near my home, there’s a vacation house owned by a couple. The husband works in construction, and the wife is a teacher. For 20 years, they didn’t spend any money on the vacation house. However, in 2017, the wife requested a $120,000 renovation to convert the vacation house into a permanent residence. The husband had to take out a 10-year loan for this. Now, she spends weekdays alone in this “new” house while still living with her husband. Consequently, they have to cover the expenses for electricity, internet, and water for this additional property. During the nineties, I never witnessed women triggering such significant expenses.

Conclusion:

In recent times, hypergamy has become a prevalent behavior worldwide among some women. Those women have realized that instead of working, they can rely on men to provide for them and live a life of leisure. While it may seem counter intuitive given the shift from traditional housewife roles to more liberated women, the desire to be a housewife today is often motivated by the fact that the man earns a substantial income. This is only possible due to the high salaries of certain job positions, enabling women to forgo employment.

Between 1990 and 2020, there has been a significant increase in expectations among some girlfriends and wives. This inflation of expectations has contributed to the rise of hypergamy and the desire for some women to rely on men for financial support.